Have you ever complained about something to a friend, only to be met with "Yeah, I get that too", or maybe you've mentioned your period pain, you're experiencing exhaustion, bloating or headaches to someone and heard "Well, it's just the "joys" of being a woman" ?

Because other women experience it too, you might assume it's all normal. But here's the thing...

✨ Something being common doesn't necessarily mean it's normal and have live with. ✨ 

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So... What Actually Is Normal? 🤔

Let's start with our periods. A lot of women experience some level of cramping, tenderness, bloating, fatigue, general discomfort or mood changes around their period, and can all be normal parts of the menstrual cycle. 

○ But what happens when your period is so painful that you can barely get out of bed?

○ Or you need to change your pad or tampon every hour because you're bleeding so heavily?

○ What if your period is so bad that you're consistently missing work, cancelling plans or avoiding daily tasks?

At some point, we need to realize that "this is normal for me" is very different from "this is healthy for me". This is a very important distinction to make, because women have been putting up with period symptoms for a very long time.

We're told to just take a pain killer, to use a hot water bottle, to get some rest or are urged to have to "push through". When the period is over, it's fine, we move on.

Until next month...

When Did We Become So Good At Pushing Through? 

I believe women are amazing at adapting. We plan around our periods, we carry spare products and painkillers everywhere, we learn which days we're likely to feel sore or introverted (so we don't make any plans), we work from home if we can, we cancel our plans when we have to etc etc.

Eventually, these things become part of our routine. And that's the tricky part, because when something has been happening for years, it's hard to recognize that it might not be something you simply have to accept. 

For me, this raises an interesting question.

How many symptoms have we labelled "normal" just because so many women experience them?

Yes, some period pain is normal. The uterus contracts during menstruation to help shed its lining, and those contractions can cause cramping. For some women, the discomfort is mild and manageable, whereas for others, it can be much more intense. 

It's not about whether you experience pain or not, it's how severe it is and what impact it has on your life. 

If you regularly can't go to work, exercise, sleep well, socialize or carry out your normal daily activities because of your period, then that's worth noting and seeking medical advice. 

You shouldn't have to wait until the pain or symptoms become unbearable. You also don't need to convince yourself that you're being 'sensitive'. Most of all, you don't need to compare your pain to someone else's.

What About Heavy Bleeding? 🩸

Heavy bleeding is another problem that can be surprisingly hard to identify. Some people naturally have heavier periods and the flow can vary throughout your life. But if you're needing to change your pad or tampon every hour or so, if you're bleeding for longer than usual, if you're passing large blood clots, bleeding through clothes etc, then it's worth chatting with a professional. 

Heavy bleeding can also contribute to iron deficiency, which can easily leave you feeling tired, weak and short of breath. Now suddenly, that "I'm just feeling so exhausted lately" conversation starts to look a little different. 

Which brings up something else very important. 

Your Symptoms Don't Need To Be Unbearable In Order To Matter 💗

I think we have this idea that we need to be really unwell before it's worthy enough to seek help. But healthcare shouldn't be only about treating emergencies. It should be about understanding your body, noticing changes and getting support when it's starts affecting your day to day life. 

Maybe your period isn't completely debilitating, maybe it just makes three days of every month miserable, maybe you can still go to work but you need to pop your painkillers and you're body is aching, maybe you always thought "that's just how my body is". 

But I believe instead of learning "I just need to deal with it", we should think:

✨ "Is there anything I can do to help me feel better?" ✨

This Doesn't Only Apply To Periods

The idea for "this is normal for women" goes much much further. During and after pregnancy, women experience changes to their pelvic floor, bladder control, sexual health and body. 

As we age, our sleep, energy, periods, muscles, bones and hormones all change. 

Stress can become so familiar that feeling constant exhaustion is considered "normal". And hormonal changes can be the automatic explanation for everything from brain fog to mood changes. 

Yes, some of these experiences are completely normal, but there's a difference between saying:

"This can happen to women" vs "There's nothing you can do about it". 

Those aren't the same thing. 

So... Is What I'm Feeling "Normal"?

Maybe. Maybe it's simply part of your body's normal cycle. But maybe it's something that deserves a little more attention. And that's really the point of this conversation (well... blog 🩷).

I'm not saying every symptom is a warning sign and that we should panic every time something changes. I'm just saying that we all deserve to understand our own bodies. 

Instead of asking "Is this normal?", we should also be asking:

👉 Is this affecting my quality of life?

👉 Do I know why these changes/symptoms are happening?

👉 Is there something I can do that could help how I feel / my experience?

And most importantly...

Am I putting up with something just because I've been told it's 'normal'?

💗